Of sunsets and squandering.

In any other context, it would have sounded profane… I was just starting to pray, out loud, but turned a corner on the road (best praying seems to be done when driving), and out popped “Oh God!!!!!”  For, to my left, and above me, was the most spectacular sunset I have ever seen in my life.  The colors molded together, and I could look straight up into pinks and purples.  Half the sky was filled with the glory of the Lord.  I have Never seen a sunset such as this.  It was absolutely phenomenal.  I wanted to get out of my car, and just stare…. but I would have been late for Bible study.

But, I wondered what the unbeliever does in those moments, for I could not help but rejoice in the slendor of my King – in His goodness to man.  I finished my thought “Oh God!!!!!…  You are AWESOME!”  How undeserving am I!  How undeserving are we!  And, how do we squander it!  As a believer,  (okay, and as a Calvinist)  I get chills sometimes… do you ever go “there” – what if He had not bestowed His mercy on you?  What if He had not placed you in this time period, with these parents, with this gospel?  What if you were raised in an abusive, unloving, atheistic home?  You would be responsible for your sin… No amount of pleading ignorance could justify not looking at that magnificent sunset, and saying, “God?  You made this, did You not?  How unworthy am I, to enjoy this moment, this breath!  In Your goodness, reveal Yourself to me!”  

For His invisible attributes, namely His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly percieved, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made.  So they are without excuse.  Romans 1:20

But, how we waste it!  How caught up in this world we get!  As believers, we get sucked into the lesser pleasures.  We have a gift, The Gift, and we not only don’t share it, we don’t even enjoy it ourselves. 

I want, when I look at the sunsets, the fall leaves turning, the river, to think on God’s goodness, to us all.  To me… I want to delight in His creativity and brilliance – and then to magnify my delight by proving I am Most delighted in Him.  I do not want to settle for a half-hearted, mediocre Christianity.  It is certainly not what I, or any of us, were called to.  I do not put everything in today, while it is still called today.  I hide behind the lie that the worst thing I can do to ourselves is suffer burnout…  I am in the business of self-preservation, and so I protect myself from the glorious rewards, and delights of blessing others.  Ironic, isn’t it?  I sit comfortably at home, storing up energy, that may very well be squandered on 100 lesser pleasures.  Piper said “To risk is right, better to lose your life than to waste it.”  I am looking for those opportunities to risk, to bless others, to glorify God.  To Praxy my Doxy.  

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